Adab

Hari ni, kita orang dekat Batam. I do not really like to go to Batam, but since Mr. T wants to spend some time with the orphans here, it got me excited! I needed to see them, to heal this lost soul. For me to be grateful each day and be more motivated in living my life. Yeah, this soul who is just wandering about the success and failures in life. And so, we brought our daughters along, to expose our daughters to the less fortunate. My heart wanted to cry from the beginning of meeting them, but I forced myself not to shed any tear. I don't want to be seen as the dramatic Aunty. Haha.. Tapi sungguh hati ini rasa sayu sangat bila duduk bersama anak anak yatim. Hati rasa bersalah. Yes so guilty of being ungrateful to Allah. So guilty of sinning, so ashamed of asking Allah for so much more when, what He has given me is enough. May Allah bless our rezq, so that others can benefit from it too. Ya Rabb.

During the session with these orphans, their head leader an Ustaz who was from the same orphanage explained the meaning of my kids name. Yes, I named them after getting inspired by the sababiyyat.. He explained one of their names wrongly. He shared the story of Al-Khansa instead of the Nusaybah bint Ka'ab. When we got back to the hotel, and when I got the time to ask Mr. T about a situation like that. A situation Where, I know that information is wrong, should I correct him, or should I keep quiet? I was about to just tell him straight that who he meant was Al-Khansa and not Nusaybah. But luckily, I did not. Mr. T advised me on adab. bla bla bla.. (Hahahaha) The etiquette of advising someone. Especially not in front of his students. (Ya Allaaahhh. Leceh betulkan?) Tapi tu lah. Agaknya Allah sayang dia lebih sebab adab dia. Tsk!!

Adab... Yeah the etiquette of being with someone.

Coincidentally, I bought a book on Adab with Allah.

I have this habit of buying books whenever I travel. I like to explore their bookstore. It speaks a lot about what is in their youth mind. What they are promoting and the current ideas they have. Whenever I buy books, my kids get to choose their own book too. This way, I am influencing them to enjoy or purchase any book they find interesting. Just to set a habit of going into a bookstore.

In this book, I enjoy the sets of du'a taught. I think I have to start memorising the du'a that I like. Especially the long du'a read after solat sunnah fajr. I suka la doa2 ni. It makes me feel small and humble in front of Allah. I love how Rasulluah (saw) arranged the words into a du'a. It is perfectly placed. I want to end this with speaking about adab between husband and wife. (Marriage) So Mr. T has been nagging at me to dress well, look good and be more presentable. He will comment about my choice of tudung, the color of my hair, the dress, shoes, my skin condition.. oh everything. If you know me well, I never like dressing up. I rather look ugly. I dont want people to be attracted to me. I do not need the attention. Urghhh.. Leceh laa nak kena layan benda2 yang tak patut di layan. So kenapa undang kan kan kan?

But! Since this is a halal request from my husband. I am forcing myself to change. To look good for him. (Susah la nak keep up to look good. Banyak sangat maintenance nya) So I told him.. "You know I do not like to look good? This is why I don't want to use my money. So i am claiming from you."

Allah yahmini yaa rabb.

Yahmina jami'an.

Alhamdulilah Allah kasi husband yang suka spend on me. Ensuring that I look good. Although I prefer not. Tapi Allah selalu kasi apa yang kita perlu bukan apa yang kita mahu. Banyak je wanita2 lain yang inginkan husband mereka supply them with all their skincare, make up and bla bla. Because they enjoy looking good. But there is also me. Who rather use that money to do lots of extreme sports activities. Bawa la aku gi hiking ke, main motor ke, jetski ke, naik plane terjun parachute ke.. kan besttt! tapi apa kah daya... habibi suka aku jadi girl girl. (aku redha walau tersiksa. hahaha. effort oieee nak kena jadi cantik) Semoga Allah terima segala usaha ku ini. Untuk suami. (This is my sacrifice okkk)